There are some things you have to accept, before you can move on...

I wish I could compile a guide for aspiring artists, tell them everything they need to know before they have to deal with it.  Of course that would ruin the surprise.  And I wouldn't be able to enjoy them squirm in their agony. 

There are some things you have to learn to accept, and failure is one of them.  Sometimes an idea doesn't pan out.  Sometimes no matter how hard you try, it never will.  Failure is part of the process of learning.  It helps you avoid certain things, ideas, habits even.  Failure will help you understand and theorise better ways of approaching your ideas--reworking them, questioning what could be done better.

Failure is not the same as never trying (go to class, do your goddamn work!).  Failure is trying, experimenting, but finding an unsatisfactory result.  But be satisfied that you can accept failure; accept it, do not dwell on it, move on.

I can paint, I can totally paint....

That's all.

exploring my options

I really haven't worked with pencil crayons since..  Since probably high school.  Still not crazy about them, just because usually with dry media colours you tend to have to work with a wide variety of colours, and I'm more for colour theory & colour mixing.  Not that you can't do that with dry media, but the colours tend to muddy up when you do...

also, kinda expensive.

I've been watching Due South all evening.  If there was one reason to work at home, it's for the good internet connection + watch whatever the heck I want as loud as I want.

Work in process...

I feel like... I need to find a rat skull... Where do I even find rat skulls...

 

(rat skull study w/ charcoal)

The face (from this post) erased to reveal a rat's skull.
Can't decide how much I like it (or don't).  I like the concept, I'd like to work the concept up a little more...  may need to work out the imagery better... 

feeling a little lazy...  Just want a day to myself.

Made up faces

 

(marking my territory!)

 

Right, anyway...  Worked on this (above) on Friday.  I just really needed to work on something, and something BIG.  (Yeah it's pretty big...  50" x 36"?)    I'm a little disappointed with how sloppy it is...  I'm considering reworking/redoing the image.  The rough brushstrokes I don't mind, but it's the water dripping--when the surface tension broke, and a stream of diluted ink rolled down the nice clean white of the page...  I died a little inside.  Less on the dramatic side-- I'm trying to decide how much a graphic quality I want; should I try to render it more to a realistic form (with more washes)?  should I make it more stark in contrast?

 Some doodly business on my wall...

Hm...  It's crooked....

Clearly a much different aesthetic from the graphic quality of Mr. Rat-Man...  But I'm trying to work out another idea.  Will be erasing into the face later, very much literally speaking to the erasure of human identity in posthuman ideology. 

I'm a literal person, sue me!

Bad quality photos? Yes please!

My rat/human babies (;u;)
 

It is surprisingly hard to find a book on rodent anatomy...

I honestly feel like I have a better grasp on THIS than I did with the abstract stuff...  I draw people, that's what I do.  Can't get around it.  In time maybe I'll explore abstraction, but I don't want my last year (hopefully last) forcing myself to try and figure everything out.

Side note, final work is not going to look like that big ol' face...  I just needed to get the energy out.